Back to reality
- By: Jason O'Neale Roach
Exams fast approaching, so spend the morning reading the newspaper supplement, including all the free prize draw cards that drop out. Fascinating. Jeremy Paxman's voice now has an incredible allure and politics seems altogether interesting.
Thankfully, my delusions about Paxman last about two minutes. Start to feel clucky later, during my neonatal examination competence test. That is until the infant decides to show me what meconium looks like on a white shirt. I inform my examiner that “I think the anus is patent.” He disagrees however and insists I “clean him up” to make sure.
Resuscitation practice is more fun, as I have long since perfected the role of the “unconscious patient.” Clare comes in to inform us that a man has been found dead in Mr Blair's pool. We later discover that she actually meant Mr Barrymore. Presumably, Mr Blair's pool remains dead body free.
Family planning. Volunteer to