Medicine and the master criminal
I have a confession to make—medicine has turned me into an accomplished burglar. I expected to learn many things at university, but the art of breaking into houses was not one of them. Yet the further I progress through medical school, the more developed my burglary skills become.
I started small, as most do: I learnt how to open a locker without a key and that drawing-up needles were better than paperclips for opening sturdy padlocks. But, as the years have passed, I have found myself breaking into houses with increasing regularity. Not, as you might expect, to reduce my ever growing student debt or to feed a habit but simply because of the features of the medicine course itself: early mornings, long hours, and high alcohol intake.
At 7.30 am, bleary eyed and hungover, you dash out of the house desperate not to be late again for Mr Grumps 8 am round: “Ah, Mr Fingleton, how good of you to join us this afternoon.” Just before it slams, you make a despairing lunge for the door but its too late. Youre locked out. All is not lost though. As a medical student you have all the housebreaking